Parlor Spider...Step In, Little Fly

Insightful thoughts and/or rants from atop the soapbox from one who wishes to share the "right" opinion with everyone.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

"I Have Thumbs...Can I Drive a Sports Car?

While the creation/evolution argument goes on an on and on and on (ad infinitum), scientists continue to study both apes and humans regularly. One would think by now that everything would be known that could be known, or that behaviorists would begin to study something else, but not so, it appears. Now that we've decided aliens are probably no more likely than vampires or Sasquatch, despite the conspiracy theorists, we return again to study the species that most closely resembles humans, if only due to the fact that it has opposable thumbs to distinguish it from, say, cows.
Anyway, in a study completed by Alexander Weiss of Edinburgh University and reported in Time magazine, it has been postulated that the great apes suffer from a malady quite common in their more humanoid descendants (for the evolutionists). On the other hand, this finding can be merely a quirk that occurs throughout the animal kingdom in ALL species (for the creationists). While the science isn't foolproof since zookeepers responded to the questions rather than the apes themselves, there is enough evidence, it appears, to begin a whole new rush toward scientific research looking for proof that...
apes have midlife crises just like humans do!
The occurrence in humans is well documented, at least from the male perspective. Sports cars, trophy wives, new careers: these are all signs that a man somewhere between his mid-thirties and fifty is undergoing a re-evaluation of his life and finding the results lacking. Odd now that I think about it: have we really studied whether female humans have the same crises that males so pointedly have? Or is it menopause that redefines a woman, albeit at a later stage? I have no idea, and I probably don't want to know since too much information can be dangerous(that for the creationists, too).
In the great apes, the desire to redirect a life comes in the form (according to human respondents) of wishing to mate with more females or gaining access to more resources; exactly what those "resources" are was not identified by Weiss, but it bears further study. Scientists are already suggesting that "real" research would involve monitoring hormone levels as well as other chemical balances (or imbalances) to determine the "crisis" stage.
Interesting enough, however, is the idea that apes, like humans, tend to have a sense of well being early in life; this sense is followed by the midlife crisis which, in turn, is followed by an upsurge in well-being as the apes age! No more trudging to work every day...no more mortgage... no more wailing children hanging about...Oh, that's me not the apes.
What do they have to be so upbeat about?
It's not like they get to go to The Villages and hang (literally or not) out with others just like themselves.
We need more scientists studying this problem.

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