"To Sir, With Love" It Isn't...Mostly

I hear it all the time from relatives to neighbors, to Marcus' grandmother last week: there's a negative stigma attached to being a teacher. It's like we're all degenerates "Looking for Lolita," or we're 'way overpaid for only working six hours a day nine months of the year or the benefits we get are worthy of the CEO of Mobil/Exxon...and on and on. While compared to the najority of folks, we do ok, there are some things most don't consider. Here's how my last few days went:
I walked into a locker room last week to supervise after a gym class. As I felt a bit uncomfortable watching guys change clothes, I opened the door to the bathroom just for something to do. Some student had taken his lunch for a log ride (if you get my meaning) in the wrong receptacle. The stench was overpowering, and there was nothing to do but extricate the offending matter (I'm TRYING to be delicate, here) and put it in the appropriate place for evacuation. I could have tried to find the janitor and walked away, but I felt it was my duty to students to show them that if one sees something amiss and can rectify (so to speak)it, action should be taken. OK, fine...next day SAME THING!!! I knew it was the same person (really, it could have been DNA or a fingerprint and been less identifiable). Now, I was seriously peeved so I set about trying to nab the person who felt he had squatter's rights (as it were). Over a week later, and no return. Good and bad. Good in that I don't have to actually deal with it anymore, and bad because I had that rolled up newspaper all ready!
Yesterday, I almost get a sprained spleen as two kids came careening by me engaged in a "Flying Fists of Death" debate over who could swing harder and punch less. Naturally, I somewhat wanted to find out myself, but breaking up fisticuffs is in my job description, even as a casual passerby, which I was. Fortunately, my spleen remains intact, but a one-day suspension and a disorderly conduct fine each, and both were back in the friendly confines today. My rep has been greatly enhanced though...students stand, moth agape as they marvel at what they saw (this occurred in a commons area during break time and was witnessed by many). Other staff members a) avoid that area altogether now and b) take great delight in making up fierce nicknames for me.
Hoping for a calmer day was beyond expectation.
"Hey, Mr. Patterson, the urinal is overflowing in the locker room!" I rush in to note that such a thing IS, in fact, happening, and there is nothing I can think of to do since it doesn't appear to be blocked by toilet paper or any less desirable material. I rush to get Blackie ( sound asleep in his chair since it's lunch time) who hammers on the descending pipe for a moment and the process is reversed. Water is now running into the drain. A hammer? I could have done that if I'd known. Watch for broken pipes soon!
Tell me you get to do stuff like that with regularity in YOUR job!
I truly DO have the most interesting job on the planet