N.efarious B.eatings A.bound

A much poorer Carmelo Anthony

'Melo ain't so mellow anymore. The National Basketball Association's leading scorer just got hit with a 15-day suspension for throwing a haymaker in a contest last week with the Knicks (if any game involving the Knicks this year can be called a "contest") The suspension includes a loss of salary. That means that he will lose $42,518.12 more per day than I would if I were to get suspended without pay for fifteen days. It's hard to feel too sorry for him, but I know I'D miss the cash if I didn't have it so he must, too. Anyway, I claim that it's not his fault. I blame the N.B.A.
Seriously, since the game became less basketball and more playground ball, violence is 'way up. Hand-checking used to be a foul...no more. Actually, taking more than two and a half steps used to be a violation as well (not to mention the travelling "jump stop"). Now, the best players in North America (I can hardly say "the world" in light of our dismal showings on the international stage lately)push, shove, hold and travel with impunity. Where did the so-called "hard foul" come from? That's still intentional/flagrant at every other level, but the N.B.A. has a special category for brutal assaults on driving shooters. (not drive-by shooters...that's for strip club visits). Allowing hard fouls and then wondering why players get upset when they get hammered is just ridiculous. If I get seriously whacked by some kid in my gym class, it's hard to just shake it off. Imagine getting drilled by some guy 6'7" who weighs upwards of 250! That would seriously cause some physical expression on my part.
Of course, the N.B.A. is really cracking down on guys who protest foul calls too vehemently...and teams are denying players the right to wear headbands...all the while sanctioning the hard foul, pushing, shoving and holding. Get real. Dr. James Naismith is rolling in his grave when he sees a game more to the liking of Pop Warner. I'm suggesting a name change: National Bashers Association. Of course, they'd need a new slogan, too. Something like: "If You Can't Beat 'Em, Beat 'Em" might be apropos. But I blame it on those who allowed the rules to be so diluted as to be unrecognizable to a basketball fan.