Reframing As A Sanity Strategy

It happens every now and then, I guess. Of course, less often would be fine with me, but one cannot have it all (or at least I have not been able to). Today was an absolutely terrible day for a lot of reasons you don't want to read about. My buddy Joseph started it all yesterday when he stopped at my office door and said, "Top three rock and roll bands of all time" and walked away. He probably knew that just trying to get the idea OUT of my head would take all day, and, in fact, I never did get it out, in spite of humming, whistling and singing the theme from Gilligan's Island which is supposed to clear one's head of ANYTHING! Questions kept presenting themselves...questions like "Does it have to be a group? or can one person as a performer count?" "What about The Archies, made up of one person (as well as all the other studio groups)? Is it all about record sales? Should I focus on just pop music since Public Enemy was hardly rock and roll, but it WAS a musical group and certainly famous." Well, you get the idea of how tormented I've been. Work was another matter which I will gloss over in its true horror.
I usually try to cut down work time on Friday because I'm exhausted, but it didn't happen today. However, just to compound my misery, I walked outside to my bike for the ride home, and it was raining. I've been wet before, but having my bike saddle soaked was NOT something I felt particularly happy about. A cold, wet bike seat (and underwear) even for the 10-minute ride, was enough to cause me to unleash every vitriolic piece of verbiage I knew, and some I made up on the spot. Since I was alone (I mean, who else would be stupid enough to be out in the rain?), I felt OK with the torrent of swear words. It was on the ride home that the idea hit me.
Of course, a wet,cold bike saddle was terrible, but there must be worse experiences that would make this one pale in comparison (reframing is an idea I try when I'm seriously ticked so I don't break something or stab myself in the eye with a stick...and the office manager DID have to take a letter opener away from me today when I threatened myself with it in a moment of pique). I needed to find something that would make me feel better about being cold and wet and late getting home. Here are a few of the scenarios which warmed me up on the ride home:

1.My underwear was merely wet from sitting on something wet. It was not otherwise dampened by a physical malfunction so common to males of my age (or five-year-olds), and it was liquid not partially solid...a MUCH worse feeling.

2. It was not one of those times when the phone rings in the middle of the night, and cold fear rips through my heart because I know something bad is about to be related.

3. This experience did not approach the feeling I had when I realized that the snowblower which I had shut off had just released the augur after I freed a stick...and left my finger close enough to get, uh, sliced. The dread at taking off that glove was horrendous.(and I'm not even going to mention the nail I put in my thumb once with a nail gun!)

4. Having a wet behind and getting mud splattered on my chinos was infinitely better than the feeling I had when I passed a kidney stone while attempting to go to the bathroom...nausea, rapid pulse, no oxygen and thoughts of imminent death: terrifying and more than a little painful, I might add.

5. It is also better to have a wet posterior than to hit a deer on my bike while riding through the woods on my way home at night. This just about happened two days ago, and though it wasn't perilously close, I think I still had a wet spot after the near-collision. (You will read about a real collision with bambi sooner or later...I just know it).

6. And, of course, being a wet me riding home is immeasurably better than being a dry me living in Darfur, Afghanistan, Pakistan, New Delhi, Bangkok or a host of other places. Mom was right when she talked about the starving people around the world...and they're not just starving, they're dying by the thousands.

Whine about getting wet when millions of people don't have fresh water to drink...ever? Not me. I'd get out there right now and ride, but I know there's a deer out there with my name on it.