Parlor Spider...Step In, Little Fly

Insightful thoughts and/or rants from atop the soapbox from one who wishes to share the "right" opinion with everyone.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Taking the 'Trotters Over the Cowboys

Despite the fact that the Dow-Jones Industrial has plummeted recently...so far that both Dow AND Jones have changed their names to Bush and Cheney, that will not deter the upper crust from enjoying the upcoming holiday season. There's no reason why they shouldn't; after all, they may have lost a million or so, but they still have many millions left, especially the executives from all the financial institutions (under their golden parachutes)I've been bailing out. Those of us who have lost thousands...well, we're still better off than those who had nothing to begin with. Thus, it is all a relative economic picture, even for Nieman-Marcus.
The specialty store for the Rodeo Drive set just released their 82nd annual holiday catalog that features items you and I cannot afford but would like to have nonetheless. The only acquiesence to the dire financial staits of the country is an economy version of the catalog that features gifts UNDER $300. (That is, of course, in addition to the regular catalogue, not instead of it.) I skipped the economy version and browsed the standard fare for my wish list. Here are some of my favorites (some with prices, some not so):
1. 15 thoroughbred horses raised, trained and stabled by the same group that gave us Big Brown and Smarty Jones. That would be $10 million, please.
2. A three-hole golf course designed by Jack nicklaus who would also play a hole with me and autograph the clubs he'd present me. $1 million...will you take Mastercard? (and do I get a groundskeeper with that?)
3. A copy of EVERY #1 record from 1955-1990 (record player optional, I suspect). Priceless
4. The end zone turf from Texas Stadium, home of the Cowboys. Cheap at $500,000, but you'd have to outbid terrell Owens and Ocho Cinco to get it. (unlike the chunks of "Frozen Tundra" we got to buy years ago for $5).
5. A limited edition BMW $160,000. What? Doesn't everyine in Texas have one of these for their kids to go to the mall in? This must be in the cheaper catalog, or leftover from years past.
6. A chance to suit up and play with the Globetrotters! You'd get to learn five trick plays and be involved in a real game situation...Better than baseball fantasy camp! $110,000. cheap.

So, while Saks on 5th Avenue is forecasting a slowdown for the holiday season, and everyone around here is watching moths fly out of their wallets or looking to get the Wii they missed last year, the optimistic folks at Nieman-Marcus (who lost 35.6 million last quarter!) are going great guns.
Happy holiday shopping! (unless the stimulus check was spent on, like, food or something.)

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