"Thay, What?"

I've always been interested in piercings...not on me, mind you, but on others. I always wondered whether sneezes caused an emission of snot from noses which have been pierced or how much lint catches in a belly button that has been lanced. National Geographic issues with natives having plates hanging from their ears and lips were my favorite. They didn't look dangerous, just cool. Word now is that piercing one's body can be, uh, painful (no fooling?) as well as dangerous and can lead to prison! Here's the poop (as it were).
Stephani Fraccalvieri experienced knee-buckling pain in her face 20-30 times a day; pain that lasted between 10 and 20 seconds at a pop. Doctors diagnosed something called trigeminal neuralgia, a nerve disorder which is also called the suicide disease becasue the pain is so intense that sufferes gladly traipse to the nearest bridge or carbon monoxide outlet.Following a series of medication failures, the doctors decided to try something radical: they took out her tongue stud. Within two days, the pain was gone though soup still dripped through her tongue, I presume.
What followed was a veritable litany of reasons not to pierce ones tongue. Due to the blood rich areas of the tongue, infections can spread rapidly to major organs, resulting in tetanus, heart infections, brain abcesses (!), receding gums and, at least, chipped theeth (that's how one might pronounce "teeth" with a pierced tongue). While such disorders are somewhat rare, would you take the risk? Experts indicate that only "implant grade" material should be placed through the tongue. That begs the question: who wants silicone on his or her tongue? Not me.
But "What about the prison thing?," I hear you ask. Check with Deborah Robinson: she'll be spending time (perhaps as much as 5 years)at the crowbar hotel as a result of a piercing.
It seems that her 13-yr.-old daughter decided to pierce her own navel...perhaps not so unusual in a person who's frontal lobe is a LONG way from putting out smart decisions. Anyway, infection followed, and the girl dropped 40 pounds down to 75 and couldn't even move off the couch because of the severity of the infection. The court decided that the mother was to blame for not seeking medical attention during that time. My guess is that Mom figured that this was typical teenage girl behavior and thought nothing of it. Perhaps an audition is upcoming for the daughter on that runway model reality TV show while Madre is making license plates, or at the very least an appearance on Tyra Banks' show.
As for me...piercing screams at the fact that "The Gilmore Girls" is still on TV is all you'll get from me.