Parlor Spider...Step In, Little Fly

Insightful thoughts and/or rants from atop the soapbox from one who wishes to share the "right" opinion with everyone.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

So Close...and Yet, So Far.

Of course I didn't win the 340 million dollars in the Powerball lottery. There was no way I would in spite of all the signs which pointed to an imminent moneyfest of Washingtons. I don't mind, but I DO have a problem with Sen Judd Gregg (R-N.H.) winning over $850K. That's not right...I mean, the guy is worth between 2.6 million and 9.4 million dollars; he has a job which will pay him more per annum in retirement than I'll have MADE pre-retirement; and he's a Republican. That means there's no chance that he'll donate even a part of it to reduce the federal deficit.
I, at least, would have donated a good chunk to worthy institutions. More on that later.
I thought it vaguely portentious that when I arrived at school on Monday, there was a dollar bill lying in front of the Coke machine. Since nobody else seemed to be there, I counted to ten and picked it up. I pick up change, too, but don't wait so long for the "rightful" owner to claim the cash. A great start to a Monday!
My son from out of state emailed me later that day asking me to buy a lottery ticket for him and giving me the winning numbers, so he said. This was too much to be coincidence; I was a lock for at least part of the loot. With chances at 134 million-to-one I felt confident, but I bought one myself in addition: something I've never done before. No way I could lose...but I/we did...badly...not even close.
So, here are a few of the peole/institutions who just lost out on a windfall so other, less-deserving people could ruin their lives with loads of dough.
Kyle: sorry, buddy, you lose 1 million dollars. I would have given it to you...honest!
Leo no money for you, either.
Patty: no J. Jill inventory for a year.
Carol: you're on your own for Frappacino now.
Algoma School District: you lose 10 million dollars and the ability to keep quality programs going. You'll just have to cut more staff. Or get another Coke contract. No dome over the track, either, or a gym big enough to to accomodate ultimate frisbee.
Algoma Public Library: This one hurts. You have the best library EVER. Your ability to find any piece of research for my master's thesis amazed me and your continued efforts to have a top-notch system under financial duress need to be rewarded.
Algoma Youth Club/Rec. Department: Another really fine program which goes underfunded and underappraciated by local youth. I wish I'd had something like this in my home town. I might not be the reprobate I am today.
Uncle Sam: no 25-30% for you...at least from me. I probably would have donated some to the national debt though it would just go to Haliburton, in all probability.
Uncle Al: yep, you were in for a cut as well. Favorite relatives are priceless, but I could probably come close to your worth if I had 340 mil.
FEMA: you'd need some money to sort out the sorry state of your organization. The aftermath of Wilma would have decided how much was necessary.
Durham St. Neighborhood: enough money to have the best block party ever. Then, I'd buy your houses and only let my friends live there.
It's probably a good thing I didn't win. I'd be tempted to quit my job, and that would be a shame.

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