I Just Have To Be Faster Than You

There is that joke about two people being chased by a bear; as one stops to tie his shoe, his buddy asks him why he's taking precious time from his escape. The answer? "I don't have to outrun the bear; I just have to outrun you."
Chuckles abound, but such was not the case somewhere along the Mary River in Australia's Northern Territory recently. The Mary River is noted to have the larges concentration of saltwater crocodiles in the world. These behemoths can grow to be 23 feet long and weight over a ton. Needless to say, one should take any admonition about NOT swimming in this river seriously.
However, two men did not, and only one is around to tell the tale. Celebrating someone's birthday occasioned these two not-very-bright blokes to enter the water to swim across the river and back...this despite urgent pleas not to do so.
The swim over went without a hitch, but the swim back...not so much. The last anyone saw of the unfortunate swimmer, he was being cradled in the jaws of a humongous crocodile. His erstwhile partner was, apparently, a faster swimmer.
Ouch.