Spring Back This Year...and Every Year

If I get this right, it's "spring ahead, fall back" when it comes time to change for daylight savings time (except in some states like Arizona, I think, where they never change. Whatever the case, time moves either too quickly or too slowly, depending on the situation. On vacation? Just left, and it's time to go home. Monday afternoon about 2:30? The week stretches out endlessly in front of you.
Those teenage years? They seem to be interminable, and more so if you are a parent than if you're the teen in question, though it's long enough for you as well. Somehow, teenagers have a way to make ten minutes seem like an eternity while they themselves are oblivious to the passage of any time, especially if there is a curfew involved.
But just wait until middle age is fading away like your weeklong vacation of earlier days: the time seems to move at warp speed. There is no doubt that all of us will leave a million things undone by the time we hit the nursing home, and I'm not just talking about zippers here.
Thus it is that I was horrified to learn from NASA that the latest 8.8 magnitude earthquake in Chile has shortened my life span. I'm not kidding. WE all just lost some of what was the rest of our lives recently, and I'll bet we didn't even know it until NASA stuck it's nosy beak into the problem.
While I am not a geologist or a meteorologist or a seismologist or any other kind of o-ologist, I have to trust that the folks at the space agency are. I mean, they deal with naturally-occurring phenomena all the time. Anyway, here's what they came up with.
The 8.8 magnitude earthquake that occurred in Chile along the so-called Pacific Belt was so powerful that, get this, it caused a shift of the earth on its axis. Really! You didn't notice it? I sense the disquiet in the room already as you begin to realize what this means for us.
Each day from now on, as a result of the axis shift, will be 1.26 millions of a second shorter! That's right: days will no longer be 24 hours exactly, and each day that we lose time, we, well, lose time. That means that if the Mayans were correct about the 2012 thing, we're that much closer every day! Think of all the things you meant to get done before the sub-6-foot slumber! You now have even less time to accomplish them.
I think the solution is to get NASA back on the ball and see how we can ADD time to our day.
I need all I can get. I still have to clean the garage.