D'oh!

Every now and then, I have the urge to slap myself on the forehead and wonder, as Dr. Phil would say, "What were you thinking?" Not claiming to be a Rhodes Scholar, but not admitting to be the dumbest, either, sometimes I just do things without thinking them through. Buying perfume that has NEVER been featured on my wife's dressing table is just such an occurrence. Agreeing to paint a tray ceiling three different shades while suffering from a Wii injury also comes to mind. But these are nothing compared to the folks you are about to discover.
A man in Praetoria, South Africa, went to the police station to report that he'd been held up and relieved of his cellular phone. The officer at the station took the phone number and proceeded to call the man's phone. When it rang IN HIS POCKET, the man attempted to suggest he'd given the wrong number. Needless to say, he was cited for filing a false report. I found myself thinking, what was he going to gain?
Virgilio Clintron died yesterday in New York. While not a stunning development, what followed certainly qualifies: his roommate James O'Hare and another man placed Clintron on an office chair and wheeled him a couple of blocks to the Pay-O-Matic and tried to cash his Social Security check. According to witnesses, the men continually had to prop Clintron up on the chair. They left him outside and attempted to cash the check...the clerk, smelling something fishy, asked to see Mr. Clintron, and the cops showed up just as the pair was about to wheel the deceased into the office. Instead of $355, the pair got arrested for check fraud. Just goes to show you that you can't just leave dead bodies on the street even in New York!
My favorite, though, was the story about Diego Palacios, a 10-year-old from Monterrey, Mexico, who glued his hand to his bed so he wouldn't have to go back to school after the Christmas break. While the fire department freed him eventually, he DID get a couple of extra hours of cartoon watching in. I wonder if he considered the possibility of bathroom necessities.
Anyway, the next time you think you've done something goofy enough to whack yourself on the forehead, remember these folks...THEN whack yourself on the forehead. What WERE you thinking?