Loo, Loo, Skip By the Loo

It is a problem that probably affects both sexes, but it seems to me that women are far more squeamish about the condition of public restrooms than men are. Of course, women have a more complicated procedure to undergo than men do...for half of the duties, anyway. As a result, I will give them a pass in the area of "cleanliness freak" in this area. I've never had to try to relieve myself while squatting over an open hole in the floor, hanging on to handrails for support...women I know have had to do so. Picturing it was somewhat amusing, but had it been me, I would have slipped and fallen...uh...cheek first on the no doubt slippery floor. It's just easier for guys to go out behind a tree or...well, let's just leave it at that. On the other hand, I cannot imagine myself sitting on a contraption that shoots water up at me, either, so I may be just a middle-of-the-road guy when it comes to the W.C. Still, I would hate to live in China...you know, the country that fines a person for spitting on the sidewalk or launching used-up chewing gum? It seems that the sanitary conditions in the public facilities are less than desirable, according to BBC reporter Michael Bristow who notes that he will use one only in the most dire emergency (and we've ALL had those, haven't we?). Bristow's account mentions that one can always smell a public facility in Beijing LONG before it comes into view; this is probably due to the fact that most people who live in that city do not have a private bathroom in their apartment/hovel or wherever they reside. Imagine a city densely packed as Beijing must be in which everyone rushes to the washroom on the corner! Bristow also points out that such facilities almost never have soap OR toilet paper! WOW! This thought makes the Port-A-Potty in the park a five-star accommodation, in my book! Now, however, the Chinese government is attempting to rectify the issue by issuing new standards of cleanliness regarding a limit on how many discarded items should be found (2) without the washroom being in violation of public health restrictions. There is also a new standard on odor as well as a dictate that notes signs must be in English as well as in Chinese...not sure why that would be. Public facilities are always easy enough to spot; it's not like anyone would confuse such a place with a subway entrance...but then, I've not yet been to China. Finally, in an attempt to show that the government is totally committed to cleaning up (so to speak) the problem, a public bathroom that contains more than two flies will be considered in violation. Now THAT'S a standard we can all live with!