Mmmm, Do-Hey! What the Heck?

I am not, strictly speaking, a purist. Oh, there are some things that I think should resist change. I don't think the New York Yankees should give in to the trend and have three or four different uniforms and hats like so many other teams just to boost their marketing. Navy blue hats and pinstripes are perfect. I'm content with the singing of the national anthem before major events, and I think it's everyone's right to blow off a finger doing stupid things on the 4th of July. I still believe marriage is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and I will always respect the voting public even if I think it's composed of idiots who don't agree with me.
However, there are some things that should NEVER,EVER be tampered with. Under NO circumstance should I be forced to give up my right to free speech, protest or worship as I please (also giving those rights to everyone else)...and doughnuts should not be healthy or good for me except as comfort food: EVER.
As such, I decry the move by Nancy Truman of Los Angeles who is about to open a doughnut shop in which the featured food is NOT fried but rather steamed or baked at high temperature...and there's more bad news from Truman who lists her occupation as "voice actor" (shouldn't that AT LEAST be "voice actress"?)
Anyway, to celebrate NAtional Doughnut Day on June 3rd, Truman is opening (fonuts) {the parentheses are hers as well as a line over the O which I cannot recreate here} in Los Angeles. The original "mistake" occurred when wheat-free banana bread dough accidentally fell into a doughnut pan, and, like most freak accidents, actually (according to Truman) provided an "aha" moment. Now, she's just weeks away from foisting this food on Los Angelinos...topping some with an olive oil powder instead of icing or sugar.
Really? Is nothing sacred?
Can wheat grass bon bons be far behind?
Maybe I can get a sound bite from Charlton Heston on this...something about prying my Krispy Kreme out of my cold, frosting-coated hand.