"Just Wait 'Til YOU Have Kids"

What, no ride?


I am certain my mother must have said to me a gazillion times during my tumultuous childhood that someday (God willing), I would have kids, and they would be JUST LIKE ME...then, I would see how tormented I'd made her life. Well, I DID have children...fortunately, though, they are less like me than Mom would have wished, and frankly, a lot of their childhoods are simply a blur. I guess having four teenagers at once does something to mess up the time and space continuum...or something. Anyway, I get huge satisfaction out of watching the grandchildren as they take turns attempting to make their own way through crazy parents and doting grandparents. The little girl is the prize, though.
Her dad was in his mid-30's when she was born, and he was more of a sit-on-the-couch-surrounded-by-remote-controls-and snacks kind of guy...totally unprepared for a baby. The household consists of three adults (one grandmother) and a baby, and it is undoubtedly the little girl who runs the show. She seems to get anything she wants, and has been known to call us in the middle of the night (repeatedly) because she's playing with the cell phone. The plastic Target phone wasn't enough, and by wailing at decibels only dogs and parents could hear, she'd get her way. Seriously...as cute as she is, she can go right to"air raid siren" sounds in a second. And now that she can walk...look out.
She has free rein to grab and throw anything within her reach, and I don't think the family has the idea of baby-pr00fing the house yet. This means the X-Box, the stereo controls, jars of change and the iPad are all within her grasp...and grasp she does! (usually, just before throwing whatever she can lift.
As knowing grandparents, we wanted to encourage her to walk, so we got her a couple of push toys, culminating in a shopping cart for Christmas. I think we've manage to take away the only respite the harried parents had. She used to love to sit in the shopping cart and wheel through Target and Best Buy, but now, it seems that she feels the need to push the big carts as well. This is unfortunate because it put her at eye level with all the things on the lower shelves that she can now reach out and grab...or jump on or throw.
"Well, just say 'no'," I hear you saying. Would that it were so easy. You've not heard her wail and seen the huge tears she manages to squeeze out. And you have not seen her being just the cutest little thing EVER. I smile sympathetically but can't help wondering what this cutie is going to be like in fifteen years. If she can manipulate three adults now...
I can just hear her mother: "Someday, you're going to have kids JUST LIKE YOU!"
Now THAT I would like to see.