Hats Off To Fashion

HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY?

It will take us months to get over everything concerned with the latest inauguration, as it usually does. Remember Bill Clinton playing the sax at one of his parties? Little did we know, a three-letter word beginning with an "s" and ending with an "x" would come to define his presidency for many people and make The Gap into an influential brand (now, of course, we have J. Crew). I know, I know, you're saying, "But seriously, Darrell, what the hell do you know about fashion?" And, generally speaking, you'd be right. I know more than my friend Mark but less than my wife and P. Diddy or Sean Jean. I started paying attention when Abercrombie & Fitch began using my photo for the huge posters of guys modeling their jeans with no shirt on...mostly because they never asked me if they could; thus, I know a little about the fashion industry though not necessarily the woman's fashion world other than what I can study while watching The Lingerie Bowl. However, I know a truly awful hat when I see one...unfortunately, both Aretha and Ellen do not.
Aretha Franklin, first woman inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, gets my vote for singing every time (even though she was displeased with her performance). Amazing voice, and she killed me in The Blues Brothers' movies. She was Queen Latifah before Queen Latifah even thought about it. But the hat...not so hot, in my estimation. Even more, she helped design the hat at Mr. Song Millinery in Detroit. NEW ERA she isn't. It would never fly at the Kentucky Derby (or maybe it would). This is what she designed:


A heather-gray wool felt headgear with a prominent (you think?) bow lined with Swarovsky rhinestones. It was custom designed by her and Luke Song (current proprietor of a store his dad founded) at the shop where she has bought hats for 20 years. In addition, the hat was hand-molded over two days...I cannot even guess how that was accomplished. Cost of the hat: $500. Her cost: zero. The result? The store cannot keep up with orders flooding the business...seriously.
It is obvious to the casual onlooker that Ellen is not wearing the same hat but a replica, of sorts, replete with a satin ribbon. This chapeau can be had for $179 and I suspect this is what the fuss is all about.
Both women are mega stars but not fashion mavens. I should know.