Thanks, Andy Warhol

Andy Warhol once made a comment that everyone would get 15 minutes of fame or infamy in life (even though the publishers of Who's Who claim it is now down to 5 minutes). While the time frame is probably not meant to be taken literally (as in taking 7 days to create the world), notoriety DOES seem to have a way of finding us. Up until this point, I figured my fifteen minutes had come in small segments: riding in an elevator with Dick Fosbury (originator of a "new" high jump form); going to the bathroom alongside and subsequently interviewing Jim Ryun; beating Ryun in a road race when he was a jillion years old and suffering from asthma (hey, they ALL count as wins!); and appearing on the cover of Track & Field News. Granted, the picture was actually of a guy winning a race and I happened to be behind him at the time, but it was still the cover shot.
I've never saved someone's life or helped any old people across the street. I certainly wouldn't get someone's cat out of a tree unless I had a .22; however, fame on a rather small scale, has found me at last...AND I'M TIRED OF IT!
I was selected by a state organization as its high school teacher of the year 2005 recently. It was a great honor and probably somewhat deserved, especially since the list of previous winners was extensive and nobody is allowed to win the award twice!
Filling out the nomination form required noting all the TV and news media outlets in the local area. I was certain that few if any of them would consider the item newsworthy...and they didn't. Just my luck to have a hideous local homicide occur at the same time. It was an horrendous crime, to be sure, and I'm really glad I was not involved on either end.
However, the small newspaper in Algoma got the story sent to it by our school media people and felt compelled to do a small story with a photo of the award winner and most of the immediate family. Fine. That's good. Let it go. My time is up.
The district administrator then called me in to ask permission to hold a "tea" in my honor for the district staff. I, of course, said "no," but he chose to do it anyway. Can you imagine ANYONE coming to this thing on the night of parent conferences when their room is still a mess from the day's derelicts? Not likely. I think there is supposed to be food, a fact which would draw me in any case."Bring anecdotes to share." Oh yeah, I can hardly wait to hear those!
Today's newspaper comes out with an even BIGGER picture and a much longer article in which I seem to say that I am the envy of all because I have such a great job. Now, the staff REALLY has some ammunition. Let me say before anyone else can that I was misquoted! Damn that yellow journalism! I am NOT your kid's role model...I have NEVER taken steroids...it depends on what your definition of "is" is...oops, channeling other people again.
It's all too much. Physical education offerings were cut this year. As money continues to get tighter, it will probably happen again next year. Public education is too important to let get away from us; our kids are too important.
Let me go back to obscurity, but let me keep road bowling!