Parlor Spider...Step In, Little Fly

Insightful thoughts and/or rants from atop the soapbox from one who wishes to share the "right" opinion with everyone.

Monday, July 16, 2012


My doctor doesn't really pay attention, I don't think. of course, I see him one time a year to get a physical, and that's generally all. If he had to depend on income from my maladies, he'd take up another profession. However, the other day as he was going through the motions ("turn your head and cough"), he said, "I see you've been putting on weight." I fixed him with as much of a perplexed stare as I could and said, "huh? I've weighed this much for years."  Then he noticed that the number was at least three years old but covered his oversight by initiating a ramble about healthy choices. Well, I have news for him: I'm as healthy as the average Chinese guy in my age group! I am also on a par, basically, with all the males in Burma who are my age, and I don't have to eat yak butter or whatever it is that is consumed as a staple there and live in an inhospitable climate (though they DO get to wear cool hats!).
Based on a somewhat (though not really) scientific examination of a Body Mass Index (BMI), scientists in London have determined that I am a bit better than average worldwide and much better than average in the United States. In fact, in this country, my projected BMI is lower than 88% of all the males in my cohort; worldwide, that number drops, but I am still in better "fat" shape than 58% of the men in my age group.
In determining the averages, the United Nations gathered data from 177 countries as well as utilized information gleaned from the World Health Organization. This information is necessary since researchers seem to feel that global weight gain is a greater threat to mankind than population growth! Perhaps, the earth will move off its axis as obesity reigns.
And I though rap music would be the death of me!

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